31. Fuck it, another one!
More along the lines of what I have been up to, instead of an essay!
I haven’t been able to, with the longer introductory essays I’ve included, get into all of the fun things I’ve been up to over the last few weeks. Here we go!
On the 23rd, I saw Jimmy Eat World and Manchester Orchestra at Central Park’s SummerStage, a surprisingly horizontal venue that ensures a great view no matter where you stand. Holy shit, Jim does not age. What is that man doing with his life that he looks like that? I must know. I have loved Jimmy Eat World for a long, long time and if you only know “The Middle,” you’re disservicing yourself. Go listen to “Kill,” “Work",” “Night Drive.” “23”?! Go listen to “23.” They performed “Hear You Me,” which I listened to with a kiss to the heavens for my friend Maeve1 on my lips, and one for my grandmother of course.
Manchester Orchestra double-headlined the show, so I got to hear THEE Andy Hull sing his ass off for the third time live. What a particular voice. He is so affecting. If you don’t know this band: “Inaudible,” “Keel Timing” (below), “I Can Feel A Hot One,” “Wolves at Night,” “The Only One,” “100 Dollars,” “Shake It Out.” I got to see my friend Frank, who I have known for many, many years, and it was an excellent night.
The next night, I third-wheeled
and Myles to see Regina Spector for the first time. I know only Regina’s biggest hits, but she is Hattie’s favorite musician and Hattie was really excited to share her with me. I was humbled as I always am by Hattie’s openness in sharing her life with me. I have her mother’s phone number. She welcomed me into her group of girlfrogs without having known me for very long, and these are wonderful girls I go to with questions about burnout ( has a great newsletter ALL ABOUT IT called !) and cat allergies. She made a donation this year to St. Jude’s to commemorate my grandmother and late uncle, who died in childhood and with whom she is buried. Hattie’s friendship humbles me every day and even though I was having a griefday over a lost friendship, it meant a lot that Hattie let me share an evening with her, especially one that is so emotionally charged for her given her deep feeling of being seen by Regina’s work. Here are some videos of Regina!Matt and I watched My Cousin Vinny, which is a perfect movie, the flying squirrel punch2 Vinny lands on the guy from the bar makes me weep with laughter every time, but on this day the father of my cat children chose violence. We got to the scene where Vinny runs out to shoot the owl at Trotter’s cabin and as I’m commenting on the ridiculous choice to have him take the time in the middle of the night throw on a leather jacket three seconds out of a deep sleep to confront a burglar or wood predator, Matt said “this is how you dress.” I beg?? Your pardon???
I finished this season of The Ultimatum: Marry or Move On, and I had better learn EXPEDITIOUSLY that there are three more seasons currently being filmed. My thoughts are best expressed this way:
Antonio rolled up to that reunion in an impeccable suit and gorgina boots and sat next to Roxanne looking like some *Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Island of Misfit toys cowboy voice* ostrich She-RA sidekick and said they were “stronger for the trouble.” I’m sorry to my relatives but my pussy lips are reaching like open arms through the screen for this man.
Girl, if Roxy Hart-less doesn’t take those THREE RINGS that fine ass man bought for her…it really do be your own fiancé sometimes!!
My most beloved friend Michael Dale took me to see Once Upon a One More Time, the fairytale musical featuring the songs of Britney Spears. I went in knowing about that much, and that Michael feels Jennifer Simard might merit some awards attention for her evil stepmother performance. After her rendition of “Toxic”….Michael is not wrong:
I had no idea who was in the musical at all. The Narrator walks out to greet a little girl, the reader, and I’m sitting there minding my white business when I realize “wait, holy shit, is that fucking Archie from The Great?” YEAH, it was Adam Godley in some long-ass pants. You may also know him as Darwin on Succession. He was phenomenally leering and menacing and wow, what a vibrant theater actor. Also, we have the same birthday. Happy belated, Adam!
My second surprise…so again, minding my white business, wishing I had smuggled an Emotional Support Snapple into the show, when bam, the Prince rolls out. JUSTIN GUARINI, BITCH?! It’s fucking Justin Guarini! This is the second time I’ve (unexpectedly) seen him on Broadway - the first was as Fiyero in Wicked, a performance that made me cry very stealthily so as to not make my mother mad at me. He was even more a marvel now. He swung from a chandeier. He sang, beautifully. He moonwalked. He sang “Oops! I Did It Again” with the original video choreography. He was funny and hit every comedic note the script demanded and god, he looked phenomenal. I voted for Kelly and will always vote for Kelly but goddamn. I will go see this man do anything. What a talent. I hope the Tonys pay attention to the all that he left on that stage.
I also wound up sitting across the aisle from Brian Stokes Mitchell. I was gooped and gagged because I love Frasier and he, iconically, plays Frasier’s foe Cam Winston:
Brian is most renown for being a remarkable, remarkable singer and Broadway performer:
He walked past me and I yelled “Oh! Nice shirt!” because it was a really nice shirt. He said thank you!
I am so saddened that this musical is closing tomorrow because I wish I could have recommended it to all of you and taken several friends, including my good friend and reader Nick who is the biggest Britney fan I know. What a refreshing, shrewd, feminist story. It passes the Bechdel test! In multiple scenes! The show takes opportunities to be more clever than it has to. The Prince isn’t just devout to the statusquo; he is also the prince paid (!!) and hired to be the prince in every fairytale princess’s story. And no, our Rapunzels and Snow Whites don’t fight over him: they’re already en route to escape the constraints of the fairy tale roles in which they’re trapped. Every plot arc is resolved. Every villain gets a proper redemptive arc. Every character gets their shape of a happy ending. I sobbed openly at the last scene, as I have been doing in abundance this week.
We went to The Vanguard, my favorite bar in the city, to see our friend and master sommelier Cynthia as she celebrated her fiftieth birthday this week and spent the night discussion dramaturgy with her friend Grant, who was incisive and opinionated (a compliment, ALWAYS, from me) and I hope becomes a friend of mine as well. Hi, Grant!
Leaving you with two musical moments: this performance of “True Trans Soul Rebel” featuring Miley Cyrus, that I discovered from
’s recent newsletter:
And this. Rest in peace, Jimmy Buffett:
Love you bitches,
TG
